RED NECK COMPUTER TERMS:
 
"Hard drive" -- Trying to climb a steep, muddy hill with 3 flat tires
                and pulling a trailer load of fertilizer.
 
"Keyboard" ---- Place to hang your truck keys.
 
"Window" ------ Place in the truck to hang your guns.
 
"Floppy" ------ When you run out of Polygrip.
 
"Modem" ------- How you got rid of your dandelions.
 
"ROM" --------- Delicious when you mix it with coca cola.
 
"Byte" -------- First word in a kiss-off phrase.
 
"Reboot" ------ What you do when the first pair gets covered with
                barnyard stuff.
 
"Network" ----- Activity meant to provide bait for your trot line.
 
"Mouse" ------- Fuzzy, soft thing you stuff in your beer bottle in
                        order to get a free case.
 
"LAN"  -------- To borrow as in, "Hey Delbert! LAN me yore truck."
 
"Cursor" ------ What some guys do when they are mad at their wife
                       and/or girlfriend.
 
"bit" --------- A wager as in, "I bit you can't spit that watermelon
                     seed across the porch longways."

"digital control" -- What yore fingers do on the TV remote.
 
"packet" ------ What you do to a suitcase or Wal-Mart bag before a
                trip.

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Contributed by:  sss54@hotmail.com